What’s up with all the airtime Ted Allen gets on the telly? Apparently he was some food editor or something for Esquire magazine, and then became the least popular fag on
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
Then he got a gig with chef daddy Tom Collichio 
and luscious Padma Lakshi 
on Top Chef, where he just came across as bitter and unknowledgeable.
Now he has managed to horn his way into Food Network, with another terrible show called Food Detectives. 
It’s sort of a cross between Mr. Wizard and Mister Rogers, and it’s pretty creepy. He spent the last episode micro waving grapes and bars of soap, and dropping wads of gum in fake stomach acid. I felt like I wasn’t watching Food Network, but Nickelodeon instead. The next thing you know he’ll be dropping Mentos into Diet Cokes. I don’t think there’s a lot of 8th graders watching Food Network. I think he musta given some killer hooha to Bob Tushman, that’s all I’m saying!
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