Thursday, August 7, 2008

Bad Traffic? It DEPENDS!!!!!

Unbelievable!  This kind of stuff can only happen in Texas!

Miss Ginger actually got held up by some of this mess this am!  Fortunately,  she turned before she actually witnessed the fluffy mess!

Load of spilled diapers cleared on West Loop/I-10 Copyright 2008 Houston Chronicle Aug. 7, 2008, 11:44AM

 

"A truck lost its load of adult diapers and turned over on the ramp leading from the southbound lanes of the West Loop to the eastbound lanes of the Katy Freeway shortly before 6:30 a.m. today.

The diaper spill was cleared at 11:28 a.m., according to TranStar.

The truck had been blocking one lane of the ramp and caused a lengthy backup during rush hour. Crews moved the truck and cleaned up its cargo of Depends diapers.

No injuries were reported."

Thank goodness no injuries were reported-  someone could have burst a bladder trying to wait until their diaper arrived!

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

The Olympics are Coming!

A friend of the Krewe is throwing a party this Friday you won't want to miss!  It's the Olympus Goes Olympic party to celebrate the kickoff of the Summer Games!  Wear your favorite sports attire and come prepared to cheer on team USA as we raise money to help the Krewe assemble Ball 39!!!  A $35 donation at the door is a bargain for an open bar and plenty of food served up by Chef Dwane and team!  If you've ever sat at my table- or if you ever want to-  I hope you will make it by on Friday!  Call or comment if you need more info!

HEMMORHOIDS????

Osteens go to court over airline incident Flight attendant alleges pastor's wife assaulted her in 2005

By BRIAN ROGERS Copyright 2008 Houston Chronicle Aug. 6, 2008, 12:07AM

A flight attendant who says she lost her faith and suffered a hemorrhoidal flare-up after being assaulted by Victoria Osteen will head to court today seeking a jury to hear her lawsuit against the wife of superstar evangelist Joel Osteen.

Sharon Brown accuses Victoria Osteen, co-pastor of Lakewood Church, of throwing her against an airplane bathroom door and elbowing her in the chest during a confrontation on a Continental Airlines flight to Vail, Colo., on Dec. 19, 2005.

Osteen's attorney and a spokesman for Lakewood Church adamantly deny the allegations.

"It's absolutely insane," said Rusty Hardin, Osteen's attorney.

In a pre-trial frenzy of finger pointing, lawyers for both women say airplane passengers and Continental employees will testify it was the other woman who was out of control.

The incident began after the Osteens and their children boarded a Continental jet in Houston for a flight to Vail, Colo.

Brown's attorney, Reginald McKamie, said Victoria Osteen became irate after ordering a flight attendant to clean up liquid that was spilled on the armrest of her first-class seat.

"One thing led to another and that's when Mrs. Osteen assaulted Continental flight attendant Sharon Brown," McKamie said. "She threw her against the lavatory door and she elbowed her in her breast."

McKamie said Brown wants an apology and wants to punish Victoria Osteen with punitive damages amounting to 10 percent of her net worth.

"She was traumatized by it, the whole event," McKamie said. "She was seriously injured by Victoria Osteen's conduct."

In a deposition taken for the case, Brown also said the episode damaged her faith. Because of the status Victoria Osteen has as a spiritual leader, Brown now questions the legitimacy of other spiritual leaders including those at her own church, she said under oath.

According to court documents, Brown claims that she suffers from anxiety and hemorrhoids because of the incident. She is also suing Osteen for medical expenses for counseling.

McKamie declined to discuss the evidence he plans to present at trial, but said medical professionals will testify on Brown's behalf.

McKamie noted that Osteen paid a $3,000 fine from the Federal Aviation Administration for interfering with a flight. He said the FAA's findings vindicate Brown and that he expects to prevail when the facts are heard by jurors.

"Victoria Osteen was out of control," McKamie said.

Hardin and Lakewood spokesman Don Illoff scoffed at McKamie's account. Illoff is also Victoria Osteen's brother.

"The flight attendant went bonkers. She flipped out, acted rashly and now wants to be paid for it," Hardin said.

Hardin noted that Brown claims she suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder, an emotional disorder most recently diagnosed in Iraq War veterans.

"It's a silly lawsuit," he said.

Because the Osteens have tried to put the incident behind them, they didn't contest the FAA's findings and paid the fine without an admission of guilt, Hardin said.

Joel Osteen, who is expected to testify, decided to take the family off the plane and take another flight, Hardin said.

"It was their idea to leave the plane," Hardin said. He disputed early reports that the Osteens were asked to leave the plane.

"Victoria never raised her voice," Illoff said.

"And they left on their own. Law enforcement was never involved."

After they decided to exit, representatives from Continental apologized to the Osteens, Illoff said.

Lawyers on both sides will attempt to seat a jury today and present pre-trial motions.

This article ran in The Houston Chronicle today, and it is just too amazing not to to blog about!

Anyone who lives within a 200 mile radius of Houston,  as well as anyone who has ever watched TV on a Sunday morning,  has certainly heard of Lakewood Church,  founded by the late "Pastor" John Osteen and his wife Dodie.  It has now been passed along to his son Joel and his Barbie Doll wife Victoria, aka "Thumper Spice".

Joel and Victoria

So, as the article says,  several years ago they boarded a Continental plane to Vail, Colorado ( no doubt to spread their faith and good works to the poor starving masses gathered around the ski slopes,  hoping to catch a morsel of food falling from the chair lifts.)  Apparently Vickie spilled her cocktail,  and the space waitress didn't clean it up fast enough, so Vickie went all diva on her ass.  Don't judge- we've all done it! Joel and Vick settled with the airline and the FAA and tried to put it behind them.  I'm sure they prayed that the image of their empire would not be tarnished by the incident.  So the flight attendant decides to sue.  I get it.  They are rich.  Many don't like them.  The rich pastor lady shoved the poor,  hardworking flight attendant,  who is whizzing around the globe trying to earn enough money to feed her belbas.  Miss G is not here to judge the lawsuit.  We elect old white guys in unflattering black robes to do that.  But, c'mon- imagine the meeting between this "client" and her "attorney".

Client:  "I want to sue the Osteens for all they're worth because Vickie pushed me."

Lawyer: "You're going to have to prove that she caused you damage."

Client: "I don't believe in God anymore."

Lawyer: "Did you before?"

Client: "Can you prove I didn't?"

Lawyer: "Good point.  Did you suffer any physical damage?"

Client: "I'm sure I can come up with something.  "

Lawyer: "It has to be something believeable,  that will invoke sympathy in the jury."

Client: "I had hemmorhoids last week.  She must have caused those."

Lawyer: "Perfect! We're gonna smoke 'em!"

GIVE ME A BREAK! HEMMORHOIDS?!  Of all the stress-related injuries one could come up with, the best this bitch could pull out of her ass was hemmorhoids! Headaches? TMJ? Paranoia? Nightmares? Phobias? IBS? No, let's use hemmorhoids- the jury will really go for that! I might have believed that Vickie lost control and made an ass of herself if the girl hade been able to come up with, say, a head injury,  or a bruised internal organ,  or maybe even a little psychological something that she could pay a quack to diagnose.  But HEMMORHOIDS??  That's just ridiculous!!! The whole thought that our courts will be wasting time sorting this out is giving Miss Ginger a yeast infection!

 

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

We all survived Edouard!

Miss Ginger has had sneezes that produced more wind and moisture than Tropical Storm Eduoard.  The news media made asses of themselves again,  warning people to stay inside, and gas up their cars, etc.   It was ludicrous!  I saw one scene where the guy on camera was talking about the wind and rain,  and there was a tree behind him and the leaves weren't even wiggling! One nice effect was that there was no traffic on the freeways this morning!  Unfortunately,  the weather wasn't even bad enough to attract Weather Channel hottie Jim Cantore into town!cantore

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Houston Chronicle even had a funny blog where they asked people to send in photos of "storm damage" with funny captions.  This was my favorite:

"Nearly two thirds of Galveston's trash bins have been blown over by the wrath and the fury of Edouard!"

Monday, August 4, 2008

Miss Ginger Prepares to Weather the Storm!

Main photo art

Do you have any idea what a tropical storm can do to a Lupe Do? It would be a mess- that's all I'm saying!  So Miss Ginger will be laying low waiting for Eduaord- or whatever his overly affected name is- to pass. That name sounds like it should belong to a houseboy in cheesy movie.  Anyway,  so far Miss G's staff all have to work at their day jobs,  but if the weather looks too scary then Miss G will simply insist that they call out for the emergency and stay home with her.  If Miss G is going to sit at home with scary weather and potentially no electricity,  there simply has to be someone around to shake the martinis!  This poor drag queen can only shake so many cocktails before her arm will grow tired!

If you're a remote TFBOMGG reader,  pray for our souls!  If you're local, come on over for a cocktail if you get out of work early!  What's the point of a hurricane if no one throws a hurricane party?!

Sunday, August 3, 2008

More Occupational Therapy

Tonight was the season end of DesignStar, so if you DVR'd and don't want it spoiled stop reading now!  Jennifer Bertand was named the winner,  and both she and Matt Locke created great rooms for families whose homes had been destroyed by Katrina.  It was a good season,  and I think there were more good designs this year than ever before.  From an eye candy standpoint,  there were really only 2.  D Paul was this cute cajun straighty from Lafayette,  and the real hottie was Mikie V, a police officer from Fort Lauderdale who did not apear on the finale show,  much to Miss G's dismay!  Not only was he cute,  but he came across as very sweet and sensitive as well.  Maybe he bats for Miss G's team.  A girl can dream!  And then there's the nellie little Michael Stripling from College Station,  whom Miss G wishes she could vote off her team. 

Click here to view a larger image.Click here to view a larger image.Click here to view a larger image.

So, Design Star, Top Chef and Food Network Star are over,  so Miss G wil be limited to Project Runway and Shear Genius for the time being.  But,  starting September 3rd, Todd Oldham and Jonathan Adler are back on Bravo with Top Design. 

 

Todd OldhamJonathan Adler

 Talk about some hot mess mo's! Miss G's not sure she can take another season of Jonathan Adler lisping "See ya later, decorator!", so there will have to be some seriously cute contestants on that show for her to watch it this season!

Does anybody have any other Occupational Reality shows that Miss G hasn't stumbled across yet?  Leave a comment and let her know!

Occupational Therapy

Although Miss Ginger is not much of a TV watcher (she's a participant, darling!) she does find herself strangely fascinated by the current crop of Occupational Reality shows.  You know,  the ones where a bunch of hairdressers, or designers, or chefs live together at night and compete against each other all day, in challenges that presumably allow them to demonstrate their aptitude and professional techniques.  She got way behind during her vacation,  but thanks to the miracle of DVR she is caught up and ready to share her take on some of her favorites!

Her absolute favorite is Project Runway,  with Heidi Klum and the inimitable Tim Gunn, upon whom Miss Ginger has a serious crush! 

Tim Gunn

 Each week in a gentle and fatherly like way he tries to help the contestants "make it work" to avoid Nina Garcia's wrath,  and Miss G says the silver fox can "clean out her space" any day!

The current crop of contestants is a mixed bag.  Her favorite was Wesley,  but he was auf'd in the 3rd episode.  What's not to like about his too tight, too short pants and nerdy, overly worn shoes?!  Miss G says "come to Momma, baby"- she'd gladly get him some clothes that fit and a new pair of kicks!

Wesley

The other two "lookers" on the show are the "bad boys" Keith and Joe,  but there's issues with both. Keith is a tatooed mormon fag, and if that doesn't scream "drama" Miss G doesn't know what does,  and Joe is overly straight and kind of a thug.  Plus,  he put in his bio that he used to work for Bugle Boy. C'mon!  Even if it's true,  you don't put that!  Ralph Lauren, yes. Bugle Boy? Not so much!

KeithJoe

After that, it's pretty much downhill from an eye candy standpoint.

Then there's always the ones who are "memorable" in a bad way.  There's Blayne,  who by all rights should be cute,  but isn't because he's a weird ass jerk.  And Suede,  who irritates the shit out of Miss Ginger and the rest of the world by consistently and affectedly referring to himself in the 3rd person: "Suede needs to work. Suede needs to take a crap. Suede needs to jump in the lake!" And Stella,  the one-trick pony with an obnoxious Brooklyn accent who makes everything from lambskin to a garbage bag look like a biker costume,  complete with a too-tight fit and lacing on the side of every garment. She whines "it's my style" to which Miss G says- anything that one dimensional is not a style,  it's a schtick.  We predict she will be auf'd in the next episode or so.

BlayneSuedeStella

Miss G's favorite for the win is Kenley,  who has this sort of Betty Page retro pinup aesthetic that Miss G finds chic and charming.  But here nemesis may be Nina,  who will call her out quickly if her looks become too predictable or costumey.  Here she is with Miss G's favorite outfit of the show so far:

Kenley

Suede has also shown a lot of talent,  and after 5 seasons of the show it may be really hard for the contestants to follow Tim's most memorable advice: "Don't bore Nina!"

The other show Miss G just has to comment on is "The Next Food Network Star".  She simply cannot believe that Aaron McCargo, Jr. won that show!  He struggled through every contest,  was petrified in front of the camera,  and his food was big, sloppy,  and common. 

 

In Miss G's humble opinion, he was enormously outclassed by the adorable Dallasite Lisa Garza and the super adorable Adam Gertler from Phillie. Miss G says Adam can butter her bread any time!

But, if you think about it,  Food Network already has it's line up of "precious" white girls: Rachel Ray, Giada Di Laurentiss,  etc,  and an entire stable of celebuchef hotties: Tyler Florence, Jamie Oliver, Bobbie Flay, et al.  So our guess is the marketing gurus at Food Network decided they needed to expand their demographic to include more "people of color", and hence chose Aaron to be the next star.  Now,  I'm not saying that diversifying the offering is a bad thing,  but I do think it's a shame that it was done in the guise of a "contest" at the expense of the dreams of 2 talented people.  If they want an African American host,  by all means they should hire one- but don't rig a contest to make it look like he was better than the others.  I'm just sayin'- Miss Ginger won't be watching his show.  However, she may have to google Adam and take a trip to Phille to sit at one of his tables!  Road trip, anyone?

Be sure to leave a comment and let Miss G know who you think will win Project Runway, and why you think they will win!